Mothers Day Post... Chickenista Style

It's coming!  The mother of all days, the day you better have marked on your calendar. ...  (Psst.... it's this Sunday)  Mothers Day! Woot woot! My favorite of days.  Not just because I get breakfast in bed (maybe), not because its my lazy day (yea right), not because I get fab flowers and gifts (LOL Pft!).. No, because I have the best Mom in the world!!  And I get to be a dork about it!

Ive written a couple of posts on my Mom... In case you missed them or whatever, here is the jest.  My Mom was a SAHM, she taught me everything I know.  From tying my shoes to how to be an awesome Mom (I still have a lot to learn).  Shes a rock.  Strongest woman I know.  These past years Moms been sick.  She has Diabetes and complications from that.  Put it this way, Im grateful each day Im blessed to have her.  I know this disease basically there is no recovering just maintaining and adjusting.  I've watched her go from never sitting down to bed ridden. It literally takes you piece by piece.

But...this isnt gonna be a sad post.  Your thankful for what God gives you and try your hardest to understand what he doesn't. 

I think after having been a Mom for the last *ahem* years I have a little advice in me for those new moms or those wanting to become a Mom.

Things You Need To Know Before..

Can you function on two hours of quality sleep?

Can you function with only having sex a couple of times a week month .....  hmmm....  18 years is a long time.

Can you handle blood and guts, bumps, bruises, bones sticking out?

The word Mom is like music to your ears IF that music is turned all the way up and stuck on repeat....and follows you everywhere.

Can you poop with an audience... yes they even follow you in there.

There are no refunds or exchanges.

Can you multi-task?  I dont mean text while you shop.  I mean showering while making dinner, changing a diaper, breaking up a fight and nurse?

Can you go hours a day without using correct grammar?



You Know Your An Experienced Mom When....

Your kids obviously about to fall and you sit back and just wait so you can you the phrase, "I told you not to climb it!"

Your kid gets a bump and you pull out frozen peas, because you dont waste your money on the silly ice packs no more.

Who ever gets you what you need done first becomes your favorite.  And your not ashamed to tell the other kids.

You no longer worry and leave phone numbers and emergency contacts with your babysitter.  You just run out the door and yell, "Dial 911 if you need anything!"


Advice from and Mom to her daughter:
this portion is an exert from here

Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.
 Priceless.