My Funny Valentine

I feel like us girls, most girls, well some girls have an inner clock counting down to our "Big Day". No not our wedding day. Shoot that only comes once a lifetime. OK maybe twice. OK whatever it ain't every year... for most. I'm talking about Valentines Day! We start thinking of what he's gonna get us, where we're going, and what are we gonna wear the minute after we celebrate New Years. At least I did. I pictured a nice day devoted to me! His loving wifie. Here's what I saw...............

He starts the morning with coffee and cinnamon rolls brought to me in bed with flowers tucked behind his back. I'd lazily get up to a clean quiet house and await my next surprise. He would then blindfold me and take me on a car ride to a spa where I'd be pampered with massages and facials. (get all purdy for him) Then a limo would show up to take us to the most romantic restaurant overlooking the beautiful Arizona mountains. We'd come home and everything would just be perfect.

Ok I know. But it's a dream. I can dream can't I?

Reality.. I have four young kids who aren't the calmest of children or the most obedient. And there ain't no way no limo is coming down this far out of town to go down two dirt roads to pick my butt up! So we'll spend it here, and that will be perfect too. He'll BBQ (the good stuff) while the kids and I bake a heart shaped cake for us all to share. We'll make my #1 guy a nice card during art class. I'll even let them use the paint! The boys will go pick momma some flowers and put them in an old bottle and I will place them lovingly in my kitchen window. Truth be told my Valentines Days stank before kids. All holidays did.

I've tried to do the romantic thing. One year I searched for the perfect card that expressed just what I was feeling at the time. It took forever! But I finally got it. It had ribbon and that soft stuff velvet aah so beautiful. It said something like your my world, everything I asked God for etc. Real sweet. Right, plus he was on the road for like two months straight so I wanted it extra special. We went out to dinner, only had a couple of kids back then, so babysitting wasn't a problem. Then it came time to give him my card. I was shocked he had one for me! Yippee! So I let him read mine first. I poured my soul into it so it took him awhile. Then MY TURN! I open the envelope and take out the card and ugh....First, it had a cartoon on it with something funny. Then I open it.... In a restaurant where every ones having their VDay dinner and all you hear is "eek eek eek" the sound of bed springs squeaking........ I cracked up so bad!! He knows me so well. We do funny not romantic whats wrong with me?